So be good for goodness sake:

Illustration by Destiny Kranthoven.

Staff Editorial:

Grab a spare can of cranberry sauce and strap in; it’s about to get crazy out there. You’ve been bombarded all year with requests to help the needy, but during this holiday season, you’re going to encounter so many more organizations and events that are attempting to guilt you into blessing others with your hard-earned abundance.

We, the Ranger staff, are taking a stand against year-round giving. We feel that you shouldn’t have to worry about blessing your fellow man during the rest of the year because that’s precisely why our world created this “season of joy and cheer” between Thanksgiving and Christmas.

First of all, meeting a person’s basic needs so that they have an opportunity to improve their future is a load of hooey. It’s not your responsibility 11 months out of the year to help people realize their full potential.

If your neighbor wants to eat, get her kids to school, or find himself a better job, you shouldn’t need to do anything than encourage them to pull themselves up by their bootstraps. You got yourself through hard times alone, why should they be treated any differently?

With that said, we feel it’s important to help out the less fortunate during the holiday season because they may need support in purchasing game stations and foot spas for their friends and family.

Next, we feel that being consistently charitable throughout the year makes your holiday gifts seem less valuable. Think of it this way: if you’ve been supportive of a less fortunate individual January through October, then these freeloading scuzzbuckets are going to feel entitled to even better blessings at Christmas time.

It’s time to stop sending people into the last part of the year with the expectation that they will get assistance with food and housing. They should struggle like the rest of us so that they are pleasantly surprised in the event that they are selected for a holiday miracle.

Lastly, when you bless people around you during the rest of the year, you make them feel like they should be loved during the holiday season. People aren’t that important. Sure, they might help you out when you hit dire straights, but realistically, you’re only going to have issues from overspending on Black Friday and after Christmas you’ll be back on track.

All this year-round charity simply elevates people’s self-esteem and makes them feel worthy of love. It’s total crap. Other than boosting performance at work and creating positive social experiences, how have self-worth and a positive self-image ever put food on the table?

So go ahead, tithe a little extra, buy gifts for a kid on an angel tree, say hello to friends you know and everyone you meet, but for heaven’s sake, please do humanity a favor and, by December 26, take down your lights, cancel that auto-drafted donation, and flip your neighbor the partridge in a pear tree.


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